In my mind, I assemble outfits from head to toe, accessorized and everything.
From soup to nuts, you could say.
I usually dream up these ensembles, mixing and matching in my imagination like I was Rachel Zoe or something.
And nothing displeases me more than putting it together in real life and hating it.
Or better yet, having it not even work out right!
So I assembled my weekend wardrobe on Friday morning, taking extra special care to put together my Saturday night outfit that coincidentally I had already made up in my brain.
Like some weird, mad scientist of fashion.
I had told Angela all about my amazing thrifted top and how I couldn't wait to wear it.
Yesterday morning, I got to work with said clothes all packed up in a bag for a quick change since I was leaving directly from there.
I showed her the top.
She liked it just as I thought she would.
Then she said, "Is it too short? It looks kind of short (cropped)?"
I shrugged my shoulders and think I said "I don't think so."
"Did you even try it on?!?!?" Angela asked.
And that, my friends, is my downfall.
I never try anything on.
I eyeball it.
Not very smart, eh?
Angela asked me increduously, "You don't put your whole outfit on and try it in advance?"
If it looks good in my brain, it's good enough for me!
So unfortunately, when I tried on the shirt during my break, it turned out to be a belly shirt.
Meaning you could see about 2 inches of my navel area.
Not very appropriate when you are 36 years old....although I must say my bare belly doesn't look too shabby for having given birth twice!
Regardless, I could never wear it as such...yet some quick thinking and I decided to buy a black fitted cami at work to wear underneath so you would not see my skin.
Problem solved, right?
I mean, the shirt fit me as if it was made for my body everywhere else, to credit myself, my eyeballing skills are pretty amazing!
And I will admit to you that I tried on my jeans Friday morning,but only because I have really bad PMS and have also been eating like a damn pig lately, so I wanted to be sure that they were comfortable.
When my work day was done last night, I put on cami and top... it worked perfectly!
I slid on jeans....(oh, dammit why did I eat the salsa and chips laying in the office this afternoon?!?!?!) a little snug, but I could manage.
Booties on...jewels...looked in full length mirror and then totally deflated.
Well, my confidence deflated, certainly not my ass (since I had eaten so many chips and salsa).
I hated, hated, hated my outfit.
The wash of the jeans was totally wrong...the flare at the bottom looked like "hippie" jeans to me....oh god...what was I thinking?!?!?!
Luckily I brought a second pair with me just in case of a bloated moment...and quickly changed into them.
They were the exact same wash, just a fuller, wider leg version, still not thrilled....I would have worn a darker washed denim with the top had I actually prepared for this moment the right way. The destroyed wash was too light for such a sparkly shirt.
And if hubby did not have my credit cards....I totally would have just run out into the mall and bought a darker wash of denim right there and then.
(Funny how when you have only your debit card on you (cash) you don't do such impulsive things!)
So....lesson learned folks.
I will prepare in advance the "proper" way next time.
However, I was fortunate enough that we just ended up going to a great restaurant that sits on the ocean here on the Jersey Shore, so I took off my coat and sat the whole time....wasn't strutting around bloated in the wrong wash jeans.
I am also eating only salad for the next year.
We had an amazing time with my amazing friends.
Here's the 3 Shopping The Closet gals together.
(Ooops, another life lesson....don't move the after dinner mint from one side of your mouth to the other when your husband is trying to take a pic of you and your friends!)
And one more lesson for the road.
Then I will stop trying to teach you all things.
Restrain yourself when it comes to Tostitos and salsa. Eating almost a whole bag and jar yourself causes your head to bloat up too!