It's been 10 days since I last wrote.
I'm not sure what I even want to write about now.
I sat in Pop's rocker on the screened porch he loved so much and thought about what made him so special.
He saw the beauty in every little thing around him.
He was grateful for everything he had, whether major or minute.
He loved this life for all it offered ~ the good and the bad.
He was never a glass half empty type...his glass was always more than half full.
Through this ordeal I realized how fortunate I am.
One brother stepped in and helped my son when I could not.
He and my sister in law comforting my daughter when I could not be by her side at that moment to do so.
The other brother and sister in law lightening my load in every way possible.
A sister who kept checking in to see how I was.
I witnessed a renewed sense of family as arms reached out to console whomever was struggling.
Everyone forgetting about their own sadness for a moment to support the one who needed it more.
Unselfish love and comfort.
An unintentional tribute to a man who provided those two things without fail.
And yet, surrounded by these outpourings of so much love and beauty, I cried.
They were selfish tears of hurt and ache simply because I know I will never see that smiling face again.
Never hold those hands or hear that voice one more time.
I cried for me.